Saturday, June 30, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Just like everybody else
There's a reason why most people don't remain friends with their exes once they've split up. I've been the exception to that rule.
That's changed today.
I'm cutting off ties. I've paid my dues.
I haven't mentioned it to many people, but I've decided to have my first marriage annulled. It's a long process, and it brings up a lot of memories I have long since buried. But it's time to do it. I've waited so long to have it done because I didn't want to visit old ghosts. I've waited too long.
So I filled out paperwork the beginning of this year. I wrote out a complete history, starting with our childhoods and ending with the divorce itself. They need all that info to make a decision. I hated every minute of it. I got through it. My mom, Kim, Susana, Kevin, and Jessica were all kind enough to write out formal testimony as witnesses to the marriage and its inevitable end. They did it quickly, efficiently, and out of the goodness of their hearts, and I can't thank them enough. Nobody wanted to go back there, but they did simply because I asked them to.
In May, I went in and gave my formal verbal testimony. Rather unpleasant. The Msgr. assigned to my case mentioned that they had sent Chris a questionnaire as well, but he hadn't returned it. No big surprise.
A month later, I received a letter from the Diocese stating that they were holding my case up waiting for Chris's testimony. Since it wasn't mandatory he testify, I had no idea it was being held up. I was none too happy. They asked me to contact Chris to see if he would be willing to fill out the questionnaire and return it to them as soon as possible. I asked him, telling him that the case was on hold until he answered and that it was important I know immediately. He apologized and said he'd fill it out and send it in that very night.
2 weeks go by. I was planning on calling the Diocese today to see what the status of my case is. So yesterday, I shoot Chris a quick email to find out exactly when he sent the questionnaire in. My email gets ignored, which is unusual. I write another today in case he was maybe out of work yesterday. I finally get a reply, and it's "Oh, I've been busy. I never filled it out. It hasn't been sent."
My response... "Don't even bother. Forget it."
I called the Diocese and told them he was not cooperating and they would not receive his testimony. They'll be moving along without it.
What bothers me the most is that he knew how important this was and that he actually said, "I swear I'm not trying to mess this up on purpose" or something to that effect. That makes me question his motives even more.
So this is me saying goodbye. I'm done.
That's changed today.
I'm cutting off ties. I've paid my dues.
I haven't mentioned it to many people, but I've decided to have my first marriage annulled. It's a long process, and it brings up a lot of memories I have long since buried. But it's time to do it. I've waited so long to have it done because I didn't want to visit old ghosts. I've waited too long.
So I filled out paperwork the beginning of this year. I wrote out a complete history, starting with our childhoods and ending with the divorce itself. They need all that info to make a decision. I hated every minute of it. I got through it. My mom, Kim, Susana, Kevin, and Jessica were all kind enough to write out formal testimony as witnesses to the marriage and its inevitable end. They did it quickly, efficiently, and out of the goodness of their hearts, and I can't thank them enough. Nobody wanted to go back there, but they did simply because I asked them to.
In May, I went in and gave my formal verbal testimony. Rather unpleasant. The Msgr. assigned to my case mentioned that they had sent Chris a questionnaire as well, but he hadn't returned it. No big surprise.
A month later, I received a letter from the Diocese stating that they were holding my case up waiting for Chris's testimony. Since it wasn't mandatory he testify, I had no idea it was being held up. I was none too happy. They asked me to contact Chris to see if he would be willing to fill out the questionnaire and return it to them as soon as possible. I asked him, telling him that the case was on hold until he answered and that it was important I know immediately. He apologized and said he'd fill it out and send it in that very night.
2 weeks go by. I was planning on calling the Diocese today to see what the status of my case is. So yesterday, I shoot Chris a quick email to find out exactly when he sent the questionnaire in. My email gets ignored, which is unusual. I write another today in case he was maybe out of work yesterday. I finally get a reply, and it's "Oh, I've been busy. I never filled it out. It hasn't been sent."
My response... "Don't even bother. Forget it."
I called the Diocese and told them he was not cooperating and they would not receive his testimony. They'll be moving along without it.
What bothers me the most is that he knew how important this was and that he actually said, "I swear I'm not trying to mess this up on purpose" or something to that effect. That makes me question his motives even more.
So this is me saying goodbye. I'm done.
Monday, June 25, 2007
On break now at work and thought I'd finally write something for poor Lea to read! She said she checks in here everyday, and, alas, I haven't given her one single word in weeks now. I feel I have to rectify that situation.
Speaking of the Lovely Lea, we had coffee last weekend and played catch up since the birth of Little Ellie. We drank our caffeine, stared at Ellie for an hour or two, and talked about friends, family, and all other things life-involving. She's doing well, another one of her friends is getting married, and she's been helping her dad on the road to recovery. One of her sisters is trying to have a baby while the other is buying a home. Lea's gone to a few open houses herself, but no house yet. I know how that feels. It may be a couple more years for the both of us.
We talked about our vacation plans for the year and about work, about our husbands and her new allergy to sulfites (she'll be damned if she'll let that get in the way of having a glass of wine now and again!). We talked and talked and talked. I love our time together.
My oldest niece also graduated from high school last weekend. Good Lord! She's all growed up now. Getting her license this summer and going off to college. Where did the time go? Here's some pics of the happy graduate...
It's hard to believe my sister's oldest is graduating and my little one is just starting out.
Speaking of the Lovely Lea, we had coffee last weekend and played catch up since the birth of Little Ellie. We drank our caffeine, stared at Ellie for an hour or two, and talked about friends, family, and all other things life-involving. She's doing well, another one of her friends is getting married, and she's been helping her dad on the road to recovery. One of her sisters is trying to have a baby while the other is buying a home. Lea's gone to a few open houses herself, but no house yet. I know how that feels. It may be a couple more years for the both of us.
We talked about our vacation plans for the year and about work, about our husbands and her new allergy to sulfites (she'll be damned if she'll let that get in the way of having a glass of wine now and again!). We talked and talked and talked. I love our time together.
My oldest niece also graduated from high school last weekend. Good Lord! She's all growed up now. Getting her license this summer and going off to college. Where did the time go? Here's some pics of the happy graduate...
It's hard to believe my sister's oldest is graduating and my little one is just starting out.
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